#paranoia

I took these photos on a short walk near my house in East Durham. Nothing heroic. No grand mission. Just… me trying to remember that making pictures can be fun again.

It’s been a while since I’ve done this. Partly because the vibe out in public has felt more tense—like everyone is bracing for something, and everyone is watching everyone. Since the ICE raids started around here, that background hum of suspicion feels louder. And even beyond that: smartphones kind of flooded the world with “photography,” and somehow the magic got diluted. Not because the camera got worse—because the social feeling around taking pictures got heavier. Like you’re always one misunderstanding away from a weird moment.

But I miss the old feeling.

I used to shoot a lot of analog—mostly with a Zorki (my scrappy Soviet Leica clone) and a plastic Holga that could turn a normal scene into a dream with one light leak. I’m not using them right now because film + development costs have gotten steep. So yeah: I’m using an emulator app on my phone. And honestly? It gets you surprisingly close to the spark.

The point wasn’t to overthink, or to “capture” anything important. The point was to shoot from the hip—give myself permission to walk, notice, and press the shutter without asking the world for approval first.

If you feel that same tension—paranoia, self-consciousness, the “what will people think?” loop—this is your reminder: you can take a short walk and make art anyway. Even if the feeling doesn’t fully go away… you can still come back with something real.